Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Former President Confirms Global Warming Data Is Real

Now, everyone knows about global warming, and most people believe that it is real...even if you didn't watch Al Gore's film (which he made a few years after he invented the Internet.)

For those few who don't believe it is real, I have provided indisputable evidence...just look at the picture on the right. In case you think I just made that up, you should know that I have confirmed the validity of my data with an authoritative source. I have contacted former President Bill Clinton and shared these findings with him. He has assured me that he can confirm my data without a doubt...based on his own hands-on research and experience.

Now, I don't know about you, but I don't think he'd say something he didn't mean...or worse, lie about it. Do you?

I mean, the State of Arkansas has even minted a quarter in his honor.

Anyway, he was very candid with me and confided that research into this phenomenon has been a lifelong passion that continues even today. In fact, he is anticipating even more corroborating data to be available as he travels the country to assist Hillary in her campaign efforts. To put it in his own words, "I'm looking forward to having access to a very rich source of data during the upcoming campaign travels that I can use to continue my own personal research, and I plan to get my hands on as much of it as I can."

He then went on to promise me he would share his findings with me. When I suggested he might want to document his research with photographic backup, he that infectious accent of his..."Hey, I like the way you think. Can you recommend a good camera?"

Wow, a former president asking for my advice. It was my patriotic duty to respond, so I recommended a small video camera (more exciting to watch than still pics) with a remote control device the size of a credit card (I figured discreetness would be an important feature to him.)

Needless to say, my conversation with Slick Willie left me pumped up and enthusiastic, so I decided to do some more research on the topic of global warming...particularly its causes. What I found was astounding.

But, this post is already too long, so you'll have to wait until next time...when I'll reveal the true cause of global warming.

Badaboom Badabing...

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Friday, January 25, 2008

One Plus One is...Wait, I Need to Get My Calculator

Before I forget...I stumbled upon a new blog that I really like, called Suz Life & Times. I like it so much that I've added it to my favorites list. Suz has a great sense of go pay her a visit.

She and my friend Judy both had some very funny...and scary...recent posts about how dumb challenged some folks are when it comes to things like simple logic and arithmetic.

This morning I had an experience that reminded me of both their posts. I started posting a comment to Suz, but it got so lengthy I decided to post it here instead.

As I write this I'm sitting in Starbucks. I ordered my first coffee from a cashier in her 50's. It cost $3.56, so I gave her a $5 bill and 60 cents. Now, not to get off track here, but if you're thinking it absurd to pay that much for a cup of coffee you should know that decaf triple-tall semi-dry cappuccinos don't come cheap. Anyway, back to my story. It took her all of about 3 seconds to come up with (in her head) how much change I should get back.

Now, today being Friday, and me being the adventurous, risk-taking old fart soul that I am, I went all out and treated myself to a second coffee. This time the cashier was in her 20's. Same price, $3.56, so I gave her a $20 bill and 60 cents.

Has anyone ever seen the proverbial 'deer caught in the headlights' look?

Well, that would be her. All movement stopped. She didn't even blink for a good 30 seconds. My first inclination was to tell her how much change I should get back, but I decided to treat this as a little research project so I patiently waited to see how things would play out. Finally, there was movement. Her lips began to tremble. Then she looked at me. Then she looked at her cash register. Then she looked at me again. Just when that first whiff of burning wood hit me, she got that 'Oh, I know how to do this' look. She figured out how to have the cash register figure it out for her.

I couldn't when I took the change I looked at her and asked, accusingly, "Are you sure this is the correct change?"

Her response? Well, let's just say that I've already seen two deer and it's not even 10:30 in the morning yet.

Badaboom Badabing...

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Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Key West Pics

Well plunk your magic twanger froggie (who remembers where that came from?) readers are geographically astute.

You are all correct...the Badabings were in Key West for a few days. And for my friend Judy, here are some more pics.

US 1 begins and ends in Key West. This is a pic of the end marker, which is just across the street from the begin marker on Whitehead Street. Ernest Hemingway used to live on Whitehead Street, about 4-5 blocks from this marker. Now, while some may think that is a useless bit of trivia, knowing that got me a free drink in a Florida bar. Just goes to show you that memorizing stupid factoids can pay off sometimes.

The history lesson continues...Key West is also the southern-most point in the United States...just 90 miles from Cuba. In case you don't believe me I've got a picture to prove it.

So there!!

Actually, there were about 50 touristas lined up to have their picture taken at this marker, so I had to snap this one in the two-second interval between shifts. And, in case you're wondering, yes...the Badabings queued up and had their picture taken here too.

These are genuine official Key West chickens. You run into them pretty much anywhere except Duval Street.

The rumor is that Cuban immigrants brought their chickens with them and they proliferated...both the Cubans and the chickens. Now the chickens run wild in Key West while the Cubans run wild in Miami.

I shot this picture of an old theater, now a Walmart, from the rooftop of the La Concha Hotel on Duval Street just after sunset. At least some of the cool original architecture has been preserved.

Actually, when I shot this I mistook the theater for another place where they have nightly drag shows. And no, I did not attend the drag shows.

No photo tour of Key West would be complete without the de riguer sunset picture, so here's one that I took. Unfortunately, the sunsets were not that spectacular during our visit.

Watching the sun set is a ritual in Key West. I think the best place to watch is on the rooftop of the LaConcha Hotel on Duval Street, which is where I took this pic. Beats the hell out of the mayhem on Mallory Square.

So, there ya' go. And're not gettin' any pics of the clothing optional bar!!

Badaboom Badabing...

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Thursday, January 10, 2008

Go South...Old Fart...Go South

The weather at home last week was a toe-numbing and d@#$-shriveling 15 degrees...that's in degrees the Badabing's decided to head south in search of some warmer weather over the weekend.

We had to go way far south in order to find fact, we had to go to the southern-most point in the United States before it was warm enough to change into shorts and flip flops.

I snapped that pic on the right when we got there.

So...can you guess where in the world Badabing is?

No? Okay...I'll give you a couple of hints:
  • Where is the southern-most point in the United States?
  • Where does US 1 start and end?
  • Where did Badabing just happen to stumble into a clothing-optional bar?
  • Where did Badabing see people wearing t-shirts with the following captions?

    • "My parents said I could be anything I wanted to I chose to be an asshole"
    • "For my next trick I'll need a condom and a volunteer"
    • "I won the 'dicky' belly is bigger than my dicky"
    • "I'm just two women short of a threesome"
    • "Growing old disgracefully"
    • On the back of a Harley Davidson t-shirt..."If you can read this the bitch fell off"

Still can't guess? Then tune in tomorrow for the answer...and more pics...but not of the clothing-optional bar...I'm saving those for myself...hehehe.

Badaboom Badabing...